A short story by bitter and angry author Bernie N Helle
In order to spread Laddy's Gospel, a chorus of tweens, teens, and mentally challenged adults were ordained by a professional marketing team and given rigid sermons to post all over internet message boards. To honor those performers who dared to wear no pants, just like in the 1900s, 1910s, 1920s, 1930s, 1940s, 1950s, 1960s, 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s, these ministers without education indoctrinated themselves with Laddy's 99 cent self-helpless mind-controlling Drummed and Based mix tapes.
These unpaid proselytizers could blend into society effortlessly, having no priestly collar or uniform to wear other than their inner need to be controlled by a singing and dancing corporate tool. Invisible until confronted with substantiated facts regarding their Mixed-Gendered-Messiah's mediocrity, they started to infect culture with their chorus of excrement. Laddy directed her mind-slave-cult to obscure the fact that what heshe was doing was simply new soon to be old person's music reinterpreted for the brand obsessed.
Laddy Glue-Gunk one day decided that any society that did not agree with heshe's inner perception of what a "free world" was, should be destroyed. Following the example of famed Fascist dictator's, Glue-Gunk directed its' followers to dispense with grammar rules and only use UPPER CASE, as Laddy thought the sheer size of the fonts would distract from the lack of critical thought displayed in her brainwashed Ministers' online sermons.
"All pants must be destroyed and the difference between pornography and art must be further obscured!" heshe bellowed. Laddy smiled at the thought of giving free lobotomies to her Ministers as further insurance that this "normal and bad" world should be eliminated. After all, my followers are drawn in by every meaningless grunt and polyester fiber I display, why shouldn't they be into having their actual brains removed? Glue Gunk breathed an orgasmic sigh, triggered by the thought of barbecuing and eating hershim's Ministers' souls, and then the rest of the world's, just like a injurious and insidious perversion of America's Globalization efforts.
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